My life is changing. I have been feeling now for months that a major change was going to happen in my life. Maybe it was just me anticipating doing what I felt I had to do, or maybe it was something more. This change in my life is really about my search for happiness, ….meaningful, lasting happiness. In the process, challenging everything I know about my life and relooking at it with new eyes. I think I’ve toyed with happiness in the past, and even helped others get closer to it, but I don’t think I’m as close to it as I want, or even need to be. Some of my friends say I think too much. Maybe they are right, but it’s still something I have to do. I believe obtaining happiness or joy is the purpose of our existence, and because of that a worthy topic for discussion.
The idea for this blog came as I sat eating dinner with a group of special friends who were concerned with some of my recent decisions. In the past we’ve shared in each others life successes and struggles, so it felt right that we were openly discussing my situation. In fact, I welcomed their concern. I wouldn’t want to go through any major change without good friends surrounding me. Part way through the discussion I decided it would be appropriate to share my experience in a blog, and in the process clarify what I’m experiencing and learning, and generate discussion on some pretty important topics. In the end I’m hoping we all benefit.
I believe as we all approach (and some pass) midlife, that I’m not the only person reexamining life, and asking similar questions. I don’t really want this blog to become a focus on me, but rather my hope is it will give us an opportunity to bring together our shared experience and examine specifically what it means to be happy, what it looks like to be happy, why its important to be happy, and how we might eventually increase the level of our personal happiness. I’m happy to share what I learn and I would encourage you to do the same. I would anticipate we would each bring our historical experience and learning, but I also hope we can bring in new ideas as well, and maybe even challenge some of the dogmas we've allowed to creep in. I'm new at blogging so be patient. Besides just getting your comments to my entries, I'd also welcome blog entries directly from you . If you want to send them to me in email, I'll review them and if I think they contribute to the overall objective I'll post them. I realize this is a religiously charged topic and religion will enter into the discussion, especially since most of us are in the LDS faith, however keep in mind not everyone participating will be of the same faith and we want to encourage all points of view.
So why is the site URL “the-dharma-karma?” Dharma and Karma are principles within the Buddhist teachings. As you might already know, Buddhism can be seen as a study of personal happiness. There is no direct English translation of “Dharma” and it is used in many ways. For our purposes I’ll define it as: "any behavior or understanding that protects one from experiencing suffering and its causes." I believe suffering in and of itself is not the cause of unhappiness. To me there is suffering, or trial/weakness, that God puts in our path to help us grow and learn. I’ve seen many people experiencing this kind of suffering who are happy, sometimes because of this very suffering. Then there is self-created suffering that serves us little but to bring unhappiness. Therefore I added “Karma” to distinguish between the two. Through the law of karma, the effects of all deeds actively create past, present, and future experiences, thus making one responsible for one's own life, and the pain and joy it brings to him/her and others. So “The Darma Karma” is a way of saying we are ultimately responsible for our own state of happiness or misery. I don’t want you to think by using these terms I’m restricting our discussions to the teaching of Buddha. Although I think there is much to learn about happiness from Buddhism, the reality is “The Darma Karma” conveyed the meaning I wanted and rhymes!
In the next blog posting I’ll start to share my recent experiences, decisions and self discoveries.
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"We all live with the objective of being happy; our lives are all different and yet the same."
ReplyDelete- Anne Frank
therefore, I think this is a great forum Joal, for people to share and collaborate ... or just listen and consider ... the challenges - turned into strides, successes - in discovering happiness and what that means individually.
happy (literally) New Year!
Missy
I'm not trying to make your blog my diary, Joal. but I have been thinking about this a lot today. and something occurred to me tonight while I was running. I think it's sometimes hard to 'find' happiness when we aren't even sure how to ‘define’ it.
ReplyDeleteI started out on my run and not 20 seconds into it, it started to snow. big fat Christmas Eve flakes. I fought the urge to turn around, but instead glumly thought “C’mon Missy, it’s not like you have anything better to do.”
I began thinking how sad it was that it is Christmas Eve and there I was – out running in the snow, by myself – alone (almost ghost town like, not a peep around). it was so unbearably quiet, as falling snow always is, giving me the prime opportunity to do my usual “wishful thinking”. and you know what that did? it only robbed me of the joy and happiness of being out there, in that beautiful snow, on a peaceful Christmas Eve. wishing I was happier, had a "better life", only cheated me out of being happy at all.
I began thinking how great it was that it is Christmas Eve and there I was – out running in the snow, by myself – alone (almost ghost town like, not a peep around) …….
so for me, tonight – happiness was wanting (and appreciating) what I have and where I’m at. not what I don’t or where I’m not. it was making the first footprints on fresh snow. being so cold that I couldn’t feel how tired my legs were getting. it was having my favorite song come on my iPod right as I hit the homestretch. it was liking who I am, without excuse or apology. tonight, happiness was changing my attitude.
and tomorrow – this could all change and I might define happiness in a whole different way. and that’s OK!
Merry Christmas.